summer

Summer vacation is supposed to be fun. I'm supposed to be making the most out of this final stretch. I wanted to dedicate this summer to fulfilling my "me" needs, to tell the world to go screw itself and just think about what I want. But I can't seem to get myself into high gear. Sure, there are the occasional parties and beach trips, but nothing has happened yet to make this summer memorable. I'm becoming restless and I feel like I'm just waiting for things to happen. I wish I could make things happen, i really do, but the lack of moolah prevents me from making things happen. There's only so much you can watch on DVD and surf the net before it suddenly sinks in that you've done nothing productive or done nothing that would rank on the cool-o-meter. Except for the constant 3pm onwards (usually until 530pm) moments that I share with the 3pm group, i think I lived a relatively boring final summer. And instead of this becoming a reflective journey or at least a moment of rest, I constantly get frustrated with myself because I wish that I what I am actually doing (which is what, exactly?) has substance or some vision. For now, I'm contented (or so it seems) to just let days pass and see what each day has in store for me. Although days have become pretty predictable, I still like to think they present some element of surprise. But seriously, who am I kidding?